We are back, with sad news in hand

Yes our trip was everything we wished for except Madison Ave. We were snowed in! We dreamed of a white Christmas and we got it. Debunking our plans to go to NY NY. My brother is having small TIA’s  which are strokes, and a larger one has arrived on the scene making my worrying go into full throttle. At first the thought was that it was a tumor lodged in the back of the neck, ( exactly where my met tumor sits)  but his symptoms were much different than mine, and I don’t play Doctor, I waited with baited breath for the scan results to come back relieved that it was not cancer. Of course his health will never be the same again, He has lost his Health virginity.

I look back at my own day when my health virginity was lost. You rationalize that you will just have to do what the doctor says to get through it. But you don’t realize the repercussions from these “past the point of no return” day. Health is such a fragile thing, one day you have it and the next day it is gone, and gone for good. He was lucky not to get paralysis and only inverted vision, yes the ceiling was the floor and the floor was the ceiling. But like me, he never knows when the next attack will happen, and he will be on life long medication to tame the beast with in him.

He realized that his body is doing this to him, not a car accident leaving you incapacitated but your own body giving you a one two knock out. I struggle with the same issues of why, but that can in itself make you crazy, and a light switch goes off in side you understanding what are the important things in life… instantaneously changing your focus, outlook and very fiber of your own existence. I saw a warming, a new rationalization of not sweating the small stuff, I smiled with admiration through his personal catharsis. I am proud to know such a good hearted  person who happens to be my brother.

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One Response to We are back, with sad news in hand

  1. bcjenster says:

    I’m so sorry about your brother, but he sounds like a wonderful man.

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