Prioritizing

Overall my kids have fared pretty well through this cancer journey. I’m sure they have absorbed more than I think. But overall, they have weathered the storm nicely. There have been a few little hitches though. The results of focus being on mom is starting to rear its ugly head, and I’m thankful that I have the time to deal with those issues now.

One thing I just knew would eventually sneak up on us were the children’s teeth. Yes, their teeth. When Charis had her dentist appointment a few weeks ago, I held my breath and waited for the results. Gasp…no cavities….what do you mean no cavities! What a relief. But within a few days, Meleah was complaining of a tooth ache. Busted! So we’ve been to three dentists in two weeks. We have an appointment with the fourth next week. My four year old has 8 cavities that lie between all of her molars. It basically looks like we never brushed her back teeth….and well…..I didn’t for a year because I was too tired to worry about teeth. So the first dentist doesn’t work on children, but looked and said there was a problem, so he sent us to dentist number two. He looked at her teeth and said she had cavities on all her back teeth and he wants us to go to the hospital for outpatient work and anesthesia to fix them. He also lectured me on my reverse osmosis water and lack of fluoride. I went for a second opinion. We did the outpatient thing with Charis when she was two and frankly, I won’t do it again for baby teeth. Not when anesthesiologists cost as much as they do! (try $800 with deductible and that wasn’t even the fees from the hospital and the dentist!) So we went to dentist #3 today and he was a very nice man, and they did talk her in to letting them do x-rays. He said he would do the work in office and do a few at a time. But later that day a friend of mine told me her experience with this dentist and now I’ve called a fourth dentist. Dentist #4 fills cavities with a laser. How about that….a laser. Supposedly my friends child felt nothing and they don’t need any shots for pain or anything. We see dentist #4 next week.

Hopefully my lack of concern with my children’s teeth during cancer will not be as big of an ordeal as I fear. I promise to be more diligent, but I refuse to let those dentists make me feel guilty. I told each one of them I had cancer and her teeth had not been priority….lol…pulling out that cancer card again! But they all quit trying to guess how she had so many cavities and quit asking me questions like…..did she have a “sippy cup?” No, she was a breast fed normal child with a mama who had cancer.

And if you are a mama going through cancer…..I give you permission to not get everything right! Teeth are important….but your children will survive and new ones will come in even if they rot out of their little heads first. It’s Ok to prioritize and it’s alright when you go to bed at 6 pm and you know your husband will not remember to have them brush their teeth, but WILL get them to bed safely and on time. It’s OK to worry about you right now.

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4 Responses to Prioritizing

  1. Kayleigh says:

    I so needed to hear this, needed to hear that another mother neglected her kid’s baby teeth specifically, lol, but on that deeper level that it’s okay to drop a few balls when you are dealing with cancer. I’m at the beginning of my journey still and dreading how this will be on my kids (2.5 & 8) down the road.

    So glad I found this site — thanks for sharing this story, made me feel better 🙂

  2. Stephanie says:

    OMG, I could have written this post myself! We just took our kids to the dentist last week & got lectured on proper flossing & brushing. My 7 year old has two cavaties and will have them fixed soon. The entire time all I could think about was the fact that I spent the last 10 months going through cancer treatment and if I screwed up by not helping the kiddos brush and floss properly, then oh well! I’m not superwoman, and as you said, they got into bed every night safe and sound, well fed and happy, so I did my job!!

  3. Some very interesting points have been made here, it is refreshing to see that your site gets quality visitors.

  4. Gotta say that the teeth thing is really an issue. This is one area were I feel like I am not doing what I need to be doing to instill good habits in my kids! But, I am SOOOOO tired at night, I just cannot run after them about their teeth.

    So, occasionally I remember to remind them. But, sometimes (more often than I care to admit) I don’t….

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