I love ladybugs, by Judy

No, not for any international adoption reasons. For a very special, personal reason.

I was reminded of why I love ladybugs when I read Susan’s post, Signs of hope.

It takes me back to a day in the Fall of 2007 — September and October — when I was getting radiation treatment for my Inflammatory Breast Cancer. I had already had six months of once/week intensive chemotherapy and was still getting once/week of one kind of drug via chemotherapy. I had had a mastectomy in August 2007. I was then in an intense radiation treatment. All of these treatments were done in the hopes of saving my life from an aggressive and rare type of breast cancer, one that I unfortunately already had in Stage IV. I went through the year not knowing if I would live or die.

I was in the last part of my radiation. Radiation doesn’t have the side effects that chemo does, but it does have its own side effects, mainly of being tired and of getting very burned where you’re being radiated. I was burned, very burned. I’m fair skinned and burn easily in the sun. The radiation was burning me so badly that the area was getting severely burned. I was tired, scared about my future, and sad. I was basically just downright weary.

I had my radiation treatments in the afternoon, and one particular afternoon after treatment, I went to JC Penny on the spur of the moment. I parked my car, but I didn’t get out of it right away. I was so tired, so weary that I sighed as I put the car into gear and sat for a moment, building up my strength to go into the store.

Just then a ladybug flew through the window, and landed on my left chest, right where I was getting the radiation. And it stayed. I don’t know how long it stayed there, but longer than I would have anticipated. I was quiet and still. I watched when the ladybug flew away, and whispered a quiet “thank you.”

I felt a peace come over me after that. Oh, I’m not saying that the peace has stayed with me since then. But at that moment, that ladybug, in legend said to be lucky, helped bring me peace.

As this site says:

Nearly ALL cultures believe that a Ladybug is lucky.
Killing one is said to bring sadness and misfortune.

I don’t think I survived just because that ladybug landed on me. I think many things — God, good medicine, a great medical team — contributed to my survival.

But that day, that ladybug did bring me luck in the form of peace of mind.

Cross-posted to Just Enjoy Him.

2 Responses to I love ladybugs, by Judy

  1. […] I love ladybugs, by Judy « Mothers With Cancer – June 25, 2010 […] Cross-posted to Just Enjoy Him. […] […]

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