About

Welcome to Mothers With Cancer.org. Whether you’ve just been diagnosed or you’re here to support a friend or family member, we’re glad you’re here.

We are twenty mothers with cancer. Each of us has a different cancer type, stage, and/or prognosis. Each of us has children, from babies to teenagers, and each of them has their own unique reaction to the cancer and the ensuing changes in our lives. We are very different, but we agree on one thing: this experience needs to be talked about, to be brought out of the shadows, and the whole family supported when one member is diagnosed with a serious illness like cancer. Our experience may not be your experience. However, it is experience, and we’re here to share one very important message: you are not alone.

We invite you to come along on our journeys, share our stories, and help others who are even more newly diagnosed than you or your family. You are welcome to visit our blog, discussion boards, and the pages on this site and to leave comments or questions. Even if it’s just a couple of encouraging words. Even if it’s just an announcement — “I have cancer,” “My wife has cancer,” or “My mother has cancer.” We’re here for you.

We’re not health care professionals, and we can’t tell you what decisions to make on treatment, but we can tell you our stories about how we coped with cancer and its aftermath, and how we held our families together during this time.

Welcome to our site.

– Twenty Mothers With Cancer

Hedgie

Hedgie is not really a princess, although she wouldn’t mind hanging out in an enchanted forest. After being diagnosed with stage IIa breast cancer in 2006 at the tender age of 45, this Midwestern transplant to Northern California underwent the “standard of care” as they say: bilateral mastectomy (although only one breast had a tumor), chemo (A/C, Taxol, Taxotere), radiation and Tamoxifen. A year after starting chemo she bowed to pressure from her Agent of Doom (aka oncologist) and had an oophorectomy, which is medspeak for having one’s ovaries yanked. The following month she switched from Tamoxifen to Aromasin and lasted 26 days before realizing that she was losing her mind on the drug. Arimidex was also poorly tolerated and Hedgie bailed on all hormonal therapies. She hopes her efforts with acupuncture, diet and exercise will do as much if not more than the AIs to hold recurrence at bay.

A few months after finishing radiation, Hedgie was accepted into the Commonweal Cancer Help Project , a week-long retreat in Bolinas, CA. There she met and was transformed by incredible travelers on the cancer road, some who provided guidance for the body and spirit and some, friendship for the journey.

A former book editor, Hedgie also worked as a newsletter editor for a university before accepting a full-time motherhood gig. A 6-year-old boy and a 9-year-old girl occupy her time and heart, sharing space with a busy husband and too many pets to list. The children provided Hedgie with her nickname when her hair began to come back following chemo; she resembled their favorite character from the Jan Brett stories. Because their mother took the Time of No Hair to play with dramatic, long wigs, the entire family gave the different looks personalities and names (Serena worked for the CIA). Thus, Princess Hedgehog was born.

Hedgie hopes to find her way back to the writing world. She blogs here and at Princess Hedgehog Chronicles.

Jenster

Jennifer, better known as Jenster, is a 42-year-old wife of twenty years and mother to two teenagers. With no family history or other risk factors, she was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 39. After a left modified radical mastectomy she underwent six months of chemotherapy for highly estrogen positive invasive breast cancer with slight lymph node involvement, followed by Tamoxifen for two years and changing to Arimidex after a total hysterectomy. Almost a year to the day after her diasnosis, her mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. Both are currently cancer free and plan to stay that way. Jennifer has the wife and mother thing down pretty well, but to compensate for her lack of domestic skills she writes and speaks and hopefully encourages young women to be diligent in all aspects of early detection. You can read her mostly non-cancer musings at Jenster’s Musings.

Jennifer

I’m Jennifer. I’m a 36 year old mom of 3, wife to Jeremy. I am working hard to heal my body of Inflammatory Breast Cancer. My blog, Clergy Girl, is to help people who want to keep updated on my progress, how I’m feeling day-to-day, my spiritual reflections and how you can pray. My breast cancer is only in my breasts… but is in both of them. One side is Inflammatory and the other side is called adenocarcinoma. It is not metastasized, even though it is in both sides. It is also not anywhere else in my body… which gives me a good prognosis.

I am a graduate of Greenville College and Asbury Theological Seminary. I served as the festival director for Ichthus Christian Music Festival before pastoring in Brockport, NY (associate), Baltimore, MD (associate) and Kalamazoo, MI (Lead, church planter). I am an ordained Elder in the Free Methodist Church.

My current full-time position now is helping my children grow, love, and become honest, Christ-loving little people. I occasionally fill in as a supply preacher, teach Bible classes occasionally at Spring Arbor University and am available to speak at retreats and conferences.

Jo/Jolene

My name is Jo (Jolene and yes I was named after the song. 😉  ), I
have three really great kids who are 18, 15, and 6 1/2 plus a hubby
guy who has stuck with me through all the bad for almost 10 years now.
I feel so lucky to have them all even when the teens are making me
pull my hair out. 🙂  I guess long story short is that in late 2004 I was diagnosed with everything all at once- MEN2a (a genetic disorder), medullary thyroid cancer, pheochromocytomas (adrenal cancer/tumors), and that is when the surgeries began.

Jo also blogs at Cancer Is The “Easy” Part… and Life With Heathens.

Judy

I’m a 47 year old wife to Frank, mother to a wonderful 6 year old boy adopted from Vietnam, and academic librarian of 20 years. I was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer on Dec. 20, 2007, and in mid-January, 2008, found out that it had metastasized to the liver. As of July 2008, I’ve undergone 6 months of weekly chemotherapy and am looking towards having a mastectomy and radiation.

I rely on my faith, my family, and my wonderful friends — both in real life and online — to help me through what life is now like with cancer. I also attend a weekly faith-based cancer support group which has been very helpful.

I also blog at Just Enjoy Him.

Ladeedah

I’m a 48-year-old single working mom with two irreverent kids (16 and 12), a surfer/artist boyfriend, an ADHD border collie, a loving family, brilliant friends and a challenging marketing career—all of which require, but rarely get, my focused attention. I also am a breast cancer survivor, which, to paraphrase Susan, qualifies me for membership here, unfortunately.

Two years ago, when I randomly discovered I had 10 invasive lobular carcinoma tumors in the upper quadrant of my right breast, I was admitted to this exclusive sorority without having to produce my transcripts, fortunately.

I did, however, have to go through an extensive hazing process, which included a double mastectomy, sentinel node biopsy, chemo, radiation, reconstruction, and early, chemo-induced menopause.

And while it’s my style (read: defense) to extract the last ounce of humor out of this cancer kegger we’re all at, my heart is full of love and respect for the mothers who have gone (and continue to go) through arduous cancer treatments for the privilege of being able to spend another day parenting their children, loving their partners, fighting with their families during the holidays, and calling each other friend.

So, here’s to my sorority sisters, Mothers with Cancer. Go Mu Chi!

I am truly honored to be in your company.

PS: If you like your individual cancer blogs with that perfect blend of gratitude and belligerance, you can read more at http://reconstructthis.blogspot.com

Laurie

Laurie is 40 years old, a mother to two boys (who are now five and ten years old), a spouse, friend, sister, daughter and writer. She is also living with metastatic breast cancer.

In December, 2005, as she was getting undressed one evening she found the lump that would lead to a diagnosis of breast cancer. After seven months on a gruelling treatment regimen (mastectomy, chemotherapy and radiation), Laurie joyfully returned to work, only to be diagnosed three weeks later with a metastasis (spread of the cancer) to her liver.

As her oncologist recently put it, “sixteen years ago, women with liver mets only had a matter of months to live,” yet here she is, miraculously in remission and continuing to defy the odds. Laurie has now had three clean (no sign at all of cancer in the liver or anywhere else) CT scans (her first was in June 2006 and the most recent was last May) and the same oncologist has declared himself to be “amazingly optimistic,” going so far as to call Laurie’s results “spectacular.”

Laurie knows that she is not, as the doctors say, “out of the woods for good” and she continues to go for monthly treatments of chemotherapy and herceptin. But aside from a few days a month, she lives an active, happy life with her family and their two sweet dogs and crotchety old cat.

You can read more about Laurie at Not Just About Cancer. She lives, writes and parents in Ottawa, Canada.

LawMom

LawMom also blogs at The Merits of the Case.

Linsey

Linsey blogs at Sillicon Valley Moms Blog, The Krolik Family, and several other sites.

Lyn

I’m a 30 year old mom, my son is 3 years old and my daughter is 2 years.  I was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer the end of April 2009.   I’m married to Ken, who is handling the new cancer diagnosis well, and is being as supportive as he can be.  I am stage IIIB and Her-2 positive.  I will have a full mastectomy plus lymph nodes on the left side in about 3 and half months, and a bi-lateral on the right side at the same time.  There isn’t cancer in the other breast but I don’t want to take the chance of it appearing there later, my oncologist supports my decision.  I do plan on having full reconstruction, from what i hear it won’t happen for at least a year after radiation.

I became unemployed in Feb. 09, I guess God had a plan as handling IBC while working full-time would have been hard, and I might not have caught it in time as I was always so busy before.  I would love to find something part-time to occupy myself and am looking into some online classes/schools to keep me busy for the next year or two, though my onco suggested I wait until after surgery to commit to anything too demanding. (I like to be busy so this is a little difficult but the kids keep me busy fenough for now)

Lyn also blogs at http://lynkelley.wordpress.com.

Mary Beth

I am a 47 year old mother of 2 children adopted at birth. My daughter is 15 and my son is 8. I was diagnosed on April 28, 2006 with stage IIB invasive ductal breast cancer. I am ER/PR positive. I underwent 4 months of neo-adjuvant chemo (4 cycles of Epirubicin/Cytoxan every 2 weeks and 4 cycles of Taxotere every 2 weeks). Six weeks later I underwent a bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. After 6 months of expanders I made the switch to silicone implants. I live in Orange County, CA so I fit right in!! I had my ovaries removed to reduce my estrogen production. Hello Menopause!!! Being in menopause allows me to take Aromasin instead of Tamoxifen.

I am a graduate of Parsons School of Design and I have been a commercial interior designer for 25 years. During my treatment/time off, I was able to re-explore painting, mixed media collage and fused glass. I also received an Art for Healing Certificate from Chapman University. Art has always been an important part of my life and my “survival”. I enjoy facilitating cancer survivors and their families in processing their emotions through paint and collage. I am a newbie to the blog world (I used old fashioned email to send out my health updates).

During my treatment, many who were diagnosed prior to me eased my fears. Those diagnosed after me would come to the meetings and you could see the fear on their faces – you know, the dear in the headlights gaze. I hope that I helped to ease their fears. Perhaps this blog will do the same…

Mary Beth blogs at http://www.marybethvolpini.blogspot.com.

Mod*Mom

Mod*Mom blogs at Mod*Mom.

Nicole

I’m a thirtyish (I’m refusing to use the phrase “thirtysomething”. It’s so 80s. I’m sure it’s copyrighted somewhere anyway.) SAHM and non-practicing musician/teacher who has become a knitting/crocheting fiber addict. I have been married to my wonderful DH for 7 years (yes we got married in 2000 JUST so it was easy to count.) I am currently fighting an aggressive breast cancer that was diagnosed in January of 2008.

She blogs at Throws Like a Girl.

Princess Hedgehog, “Hedgie”

Hedgie is not really a princess, although she wouldn’t mind hanging out in an enchanted forest. After being diagnosed with stage IIa breast cancer in 2006 at the tender age of 45, this Midwestern transplant to Northern California underwent the “standard of care” as they say: bilateral mastectomy (although only one breast had a tumor), chemo (A/C, Taxol, Taxotere), radiation and Tamoxifen. A year after starting chemo she bowed to pressure from her Agent of Doom (aka oncologist) and had an oophorectomy, which is medspeak for having one’s ovaries yanked. The following month she switched from Tamoxifen to Aromasin and lasted 26 days before realizing that she was losing her mind on the drug. Arimidex was also poorly tolerated and Hedgie bailed on all hormonal therapies. She hopes her efforts with acupuncture, diet and exercise will do as much if not more than the AIs to hold recurrence at bay.

A few months after finishing radiation, Hedgie was accepted into the Commonweal Cancer Help Project , a week-long retreat in Bolinas, CA. There she met and was transformed by incredible travelers on the cancer road, some who provided guidance for the body and spirit and some, friendship for the journey.

A former book editor, Hedgie also worked as a newsletter editor for a university before accepting a full-time motherhood gig. A 6-year-old boy and a 9-year-old girl occupy her time and heart, sharing space with a busy husband and too many pets to list. The children provided Hedgie with her nickname when her hair began to come back following chemo; she resembled their favorite character from the Jan Brett stories. Because their mother took the Time of No Hairto play with dramatic, long wigs, the entire family gave the different looks personalities and names (Serena worked for the CIA). Thus, Princess Hedgehog was born.

Hedgie hopes to find her way back to the writing world. She blogs here and at Princess Hedgehog Chronicles.

RivkA

I was first diagnosed with DCIS (stage ZERO breast cancer) at age 39. The cancer was caught so early that you could not see it or feel it! It was discovered during my annual mammogram. I felt like the breast-cancer poster child: Get regular check-ups and catch cancer before it can harm you! I had a lumpectomy, and a sentinal node biopsy, where they removed 8 lymph nodes. All my nodes were cancer free! But my margins weren’t clear, so I had to have a mastectomy. I teach swimming, so I knew I wanted reconstruction. I had DIEP reconstruction at the same time as my mastectomy. Two years later, at age 41, I thought I was done with cancer!

In 2007, during another annual mammogram, my radiologist discovered swollen lymph nodes. No one was worried. After all, the chances of a recurrance were miniscule. I went through all those routine tests, without looking at the results, until a casual comment by a friend caused me to open one of the envelopes to “prove” that there was nothing important there. I read the results out loud, and stopped halfway through…. I hung up on my friend and called my surgeon. When my surgeon quietly suggested that I call my oncologist, I knew things were not good. I have metastasis. I am HER2+, so I get Hercepting and Vinorelbine. I also get some sort of bone drug, either Zometa or Denosumab (I’m in a double blind study, so I don’t know which one). I go for chemo two out of every three weeks.

No one understands how the cancer spread. I am a statistical anomoly. (so, please don’t freak out when you read this). I am stage FOUR. I have cancer in my bones, liver and lungs. I am going to have cancer for the rest of my life. But, I’ve been told that I can live for a long time. So, that’s the plan!

 

I have three children. I used to want a lot of things. Now, all I want is to see my children grow up, get married and have children of their own. I live in Jerusalem and blog at Coffee and Chemo.

Sarah

My name is Sarah S. I am a 42 year old Mom of three girls ages 14, 11, and 6. I am a busy stay at home Mom. I was diagnosed with stage IIA invasive ductal carcinoma in January of 2008, after a routine breast surgery to remove benign cysts in both breasts. I am ER/PR negative and HER-2 negative. On February 7th 2008, I had a double mastectomy with reconstruction, and sentinel node biopsy. Which showed I had one positive lymph node. Three weeks later I had surgery to remove lymph nodes under my left arm. They removed 12 total nodes which all tested negative.

Right now I am undergoing chemotherapy. I have completed five AC/T treatments out of eight. After I finish chemo I will have no radiation and will spend my time with my family and enjoying life on our farm. I am new to the blogging world. I started my blog in February after my surgeries. I have drawn lots of support from friends and family with my blog and have met a lot of new friends along the way.

 

Stephanie

My name is Stephanie and I am a thirty-five year old stay at home mother of two young daughters. I’ve been married to my husband Joe for ten years and live in New Jersey. My oldest daughter Leah is six years old and in first grade. My youngest, Maya, is two and was adopted from China in 2007 at the age of 9 months.

My mother was a breast cancer survivor for thirteen years. I have three cousins who have had breast cancer. I’ve been having yearly mammograms since I was thirty. In July 2008, just two weeks after my mother died of a Leukemia-like cancer, a small lump was found in my left breast at a routine mammogram. After having spent many months visiting my mother at a leading cancer hospital in NYC, I now have found myself a patient at the same facility. In September 2008 I was diagnosed with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. I had a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy, then a separate surgery to remove my remaining lymph nodes. I had one lymph node involved and have stage II breast cancer. I will be starting chemotherapy AC/T treatments in December 2008 that will last four months. I plan on having a bi-lateral mastectomy in the spring of 2009.

I have been blogging for years (first writing about my adoption journey, then highlighting some of my craft projects on-line). For the last two years I’ve been blogging at Stephanie’s Written Word www.thewrittenword.wordpress.com where I write book reviews. I also write over at C is not for Cookie www.4cookie.wordpress.com.

Stella

At 43, Stella (Imstell) is busy being a wife and mother of two very active boys, ages 9 and 4. She also works full-time writing contracts for the CA National Guard. In December of 2005, at the age of 39, she was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer – the over-achiever in the breast cancer family. 15 full months later she finished 8 rounds of chemotherapy, a single mastectomy, 6 months of oral chemotherapy and concurrent radiation, and a second mastectomy with immediate reconstruction in conjunction with DIEP free flap breast reconstruction.

Six months after her diagnosis, Stella’s mother was also diagnosed with Breast Cancer, Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma. Genetic testing showed them both to be BRCA2 positive. Neither of them had ever heard of any prior family history of breast cancer.

Stella is currently 3 years cancer free and feeling wonderful! She spends what little free time she has indulging her photography passion and blogging over at I can’t complain any more than usual instead of doing housework. Shhh. Don’t tell her husband.

Susan N.

Susan, a.k.a. WhyMommy, is a 35-year-old stay-at-home mom of two baby boys: “Widget,” age 3, and “Little Bear,” age 1. Before her babies, she worked at NASA, selecting new research ideas and new missions to fly to other planets. Her current job is no less challenging. Susan was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer on June 16, 2007, three weeks after her mother-in-law was diagnosed with infiltrating ductal carcinoma, another kind of breast cancer. Susan spent the next 10 months in chemotherapy, radiation, and recovering from a double mastectomy while trying to raise her children to be interesting, creative, and kind little boys. She has told her story day by day at Toddler Planet over the past year, with the love and support of Team WhyMommy; she is currently cancer-free and starting to work again. Susan is stubbornly not grateful for cancer, but she is grateful for the opportunity to meet so many strong women and the reminders to appreciate every day that we have together as friends and family. Susan is desperately in love with her boys and tries to show them that every day, so that they will always remember how much their Mommy loves them.

Susan also blogs at Toddler Planet, Review Planet, and Women in Planetary Science.

Susan R.

Susan Reynolds twitters and blogs at Boobs on Ice.

Suzanne

At age 29, I’m probably the youngest of the group so far. I have two darling boys, K 3 years 9 months and R 14 months. They are part of what I live for along with just being able to appreciate life. I realize more how much life is a gift and we don’t know know when it will end. Since I was diagnosed with IBC when R was only 5 weeks (in May 2007), he was part of my therapy. It was so nice to snuggle and love a baby and not think about my cares. Since my husband is a teacher, he was able to be home during the summer, I received most of my treatment. That was such a blessing and it was wonderful for him to serve us in so many capacities such as getting up with the baby in the night and cooking dinner. At that’s only part of what he did, along with working on our house and all it’s remodel projects. Another part of my therapy was music. I continued to teach piano and violin lessons during my treatment which helped me be “me”, feel more “normal” and forget “cancer”. Music is so powerful and therapeutic and helped me emotionally.

I had the wonderful opportunity to teach K, 1, and 2nd grades as my husband finished school. I love being able to use these principles with my boys. However, I’m not sure if I will be back teaching school in a few years. I have become very interested in the health side of cancer and keeping our bodies in their best shape. That involves getting exercise and eating right. With that, I am thinking I might go into dietetics or something in the nutrition field so that I can help others eat better along with my family. However since both boys keep me plenty busy that road will take a while, but will be rather interesting.

Wendy

Wendy S. Harpham, M.D. is a doctor of internal medicine, best-selling author, long-term cancer survivor, and mother of three. Diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma in 1990, and in-and-out of treatment ever since, Wendy was forced to redefine her career. She turned to writing as a way to continue to educate, comfort, and inspire others while raising her children (who were 1, 3, and 5 years old when she was diagnosed).

She has written six books for patients and their families. Her bookset—When a Parent has Cancer with the children’s book Becky and the Worry Cup— was awarded 2006 Consumer Book of the Year by the American Journal of Nursing. She also co-authored another children’s book, The Hope Tree, with Laura Numeroff (of, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie), which can be purchased from the Komen for the Cure site (and with all author’s proceeds going to Komen). Her newest book, Happiness in a Storm, is about getting good care and finding happiness when you are sick or injured. In addition to her writing, Dr. Harpham has become a nationally recognized speaker for professional and lay audiences. Dr. Harpham devotes her energy to helping survivors directly through her writing and speaking, and indirectly through her activities as a patient advocate. Limited stamina prevents her from returning to clinical medicine at this time. Website: http://www.wendyharpham.com

Alumni we will always remember

Andrea Collins

Andrea finished her battle with metastasized Inflammatory Breast Cancer in 2008 at age 36. Andrea fought with grace and dignity; her strength and resolve made her a hero to us all. You can read more about her, her husband, and the six children she left behind at PunkRockMommy.

Jenni

Jenni Ballantyne is an Australian mum who fought Stage IV colon cancer so openly that we all learned a lot from her. Her words were beautiful and her love for her children, Jack and Jamie, will surely live on long beyond her years. She blogged about her experience and inspired us all at The Comfy Place. Her ex-husband is keeping the site alive in her memory.

Katie Homen

Katie Homen blogged with this group only a short time, but several of us were delighted to know her, inspired by her fierce and gentle love for her husband, “my best friend,” and her four small children, Emma, Leah, Frances and Jesse. She wrote at “Gotta Keep On Keeping On,” and she did. Katie passed away on 3 September 2009.

Lisa Kelly

After three rounds of brave fighting and much love, our friend Lisa has laid down her gloves and said goodbye.  Lisa fought through three separate rounds of ovarian cancer, and in the end, she taught us all how to fight courageously.  She leaves behind a loving husband and two girls, ages 8 and 11.  She also leaves us her words, archived at Clusterfook,

Manda

Manda took the bull by the horns and went in search of a cure.  It wasn’t there in time for her, but she never stopped trying, and we admire her so much for that.  Here’s more about her, in the words she wrote for us: “I’m generally known around the interwebs as AlabamaPink or just Manda to those who know me best. I’ve been a smug married for eight years to my charmingly geeky Mister. Nearly two-and-a-half years ago, I added “Breeder” to my list of accomplishments with the birth of my son, affectionately known as Little A. I also count among those accomplishments college graduate, traveler, runner of 10K’s, and former toiler in Corporate Hell.  Early April, right before my 33rd birthday, I was diagnosed with acute myelogenous leukemia. As an extra special cherry on the top, its genetic markers identified it as a high-risk type of AML. Good times, people. Good times. Since then I’ve had two rounds of chemo, about two months of hospitalization, umpteen blood transfusions, six bone marrow biopsies, and a partridge in a pear tree. It’s been an experience, to say the least.  Come ride the AML rollercoaster with me at my personal blog: http://alabamapink.blogspot.com/”

Sue Adema-Suitch

When she joined our group, Sue wrote the following introduction: I am the longest chemo patient I know. That said I realized that back in November 2007 I had my 100th chemotherapy treatment. In 2001 I started out with an optimistic view even though I had a so so stage 2 ductile carcinoma with 3 out of 10 lymph involvement at the sentinel nodes. No family history, not even a distant relative twice removed! I saw my cancer as a project that had no end. I was impressed by the approach from my initial Doctor Breast Specialist who became my team leader through out the whole ordeal. It was not until my first recurance in a new country under socialized medicine when I really started to worry. After successfully beating cancer the first time, and being 5 months pregnant only to hear “it’s back” just took the stuffing out of me. After the birth of my beautiful daughter who had to endure chemotherapy and radiation while still in my body, everything started to settle out with hormone pills first tamoxifen and then arimadex. But without warning in September of 2006 the pills just stopped working. No rhyme or reason, just not getting the results and my tumor markers were sky rocketing every week. When I heard the words “life long chemotherapy”-that is when I started to blog. under the name cancervixen and now cancer visa. I started not that long ago a new blog Chemo100 which has more personal data about me and less research. You see I am shy by nature and easily attach to others emotionally. I know I could not go to a support group. This blog mothers with cancer is my support group. Sue passed away on 12 March 2009.

We miss these women, and we always will.